Ren's Loneliness
by SilveryKitsune
Summary: Yoh and Ren have been friends for a long time. Yoh hangs out with his new friends for about a year. Ren goes all weird on everyone, and Yoh must change him back to the Ren that he knew. Is that possible? Will Ren accept Yoh again? Ren/Yoh! AU fanfic ^^!!


Silver-Kitsune Kazeko: Hello minna-san!! This is just a long one-shot I couldn't keep my head out of..it's Yoh/Ren of course ^^!! This is my third Shaman King fanfic ^^!!  
  
Summary: Ren is feeling lonely, since Yoh hangs out with Lyserg, Horo Horo, Pirika, Anna, Ryu, Chocolove, Faust, and Manta a lot, though he knows Yoh is his friend. One day, Yoh notices Ren for the first time, looking lonely and such. Will Ren want to become Yoh's friend or something else?  
  
It might become lime and lemon near the end, but if you could handle lime, you might want to read the whole thing, but it depends if you can handle an almost graphic sex scene, but it's not actually sex in a way..you'll see why..  
  
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Title: Ren's Loneliness  
  
Author: Silver-Kitsune  
  
Pairing: Yoh + Ren (AU fanfic)  
  
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Ren is a thirteen years old boy who used to have a friend named Yoh, but things have changed. Yoh has become friends with about everyone in the whole class, and he is usually left behind.  
  
Ren thinks that Yoh doesn't want him as a friend anymore, since he has a lot of friends, but his thoughts may be wrong.  
  
For Ren, everyday is usually the same in his school. Yoh hangs out with his group of friends, excluding Ren. Ren would be sitting on the highest tree branch in the school, and Yoh will never know where he is.  
  
Yoh always seem happy on the outside, but in the inside, he misses Ren, since it was like Ren is avoiding him now.  
  
However, this is the day that has the turning point of Ren's thoughts about Yoh..  
  
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~*~  
  
During lunchtime, Yoh hangs out with Lyserg, Horo Horo, Pirika, Anna, Ryu, Chocolove, Faust, and Manta. Yoh thought about something, like why was Ren avoiding him, and how come.. (Obvious answer though..I think...)  
  
Yoh remembered the tree that he and Ren used to eat at, but ever since he became friends with a lot of people, he started eating with the others in the cafeteria on the tables. Unknown to Yoh, Ren is always at the tree of the past, but not sitting next to the tree, but sitting IN the tree.  
  
Yoh was always wondering why he never saw Ren during lunch. He only has two classes with Ren, but Ren always seem to sit far away from him. Yoh decided once and for all to find Ren, though it may take up to a week, since there are so many trees and classrooms he might have to investigate.  
  
Yoh stood up from the table he was eating with his other friends, and excused himself from the table.  
  
"Minna-san, I'm going to find someone that I haven't seen for a while, so you guys can eat without me right?"  
  
Everyone nodded, understanding too that Ren is beginning to avoid everyone, like he wants to be lonely everyday.  
  
Yoh smiled at them and then he wondered where he should start off. He thought of the idea that Ren has to be on the roof of the school buildings, or near the trees. Yoh ran out of the school building, but still on campus, and looked up at the top of the school. He couldn't see Ren, so he knew he has to be near the cafeteria in the trees.  
  
Yoh though about the tree that he and Ren used to eat at before Yoh met a lot of friends. Yoh couldn't remember where it was, since he hasn't visited it for about one whole school year.  
  
Unknown to him, Ren always goes there everyday during lunchtime in school. He wants to wait for Yoh to come, but as the year pass, he though about it, and he knew that Yoh isn't coming to the tree anymore.  
  
Yoh continued searching through the trees, and failed to find Ren. When the lunch bell rang, Yoh looked up at the trees and saw a figure jumped off the tree and to the top of the school roof. Yoh knew that has to be Ren, and he will find the tree that Ren is hiding the next day, since it's time to continue class now.  
  
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~*~  
  
The next day at lunchtime, Yoh told his friends that he still need to find Ren. Everyone let him search for Ren that day also. Yoh walked out of the cafeteria and to the outings, where people can eat there also. Yoh looked around for a certain tree that he remembered he and Ren engraved something on it. Yoh tries to find it in his memories:  
  
~~Flashback~~  
  
Ten year old Yoh Asakura and Ren Tao ran to the outings for lunch, since it was their favorite place to eat at.  
  
They sat by the tree and began to eat their lunch. (When they were younger, Ren's more friendly than in the beginning of Shaman King..but there's a surprise later about Ren's personality right at the moment of this fanfic.)  
  
"Yoh?"  
  
"Hai."  
  
"Do you think that we will be friends forever?"  
  
"Of course!! Friends forever!!"  
  
"No other friends can take away that friendship ever?"  
  
"Yep! I'll make sure of that."  
  
"Okay..."  
  
Yoh looked at the tree, deciding that he will do something to make him remember that Ren and him will be friends forever no matter what.  
  
"Ren, how about we engrave the tree, since we have been friends been the beginning of this year!"  
  
"Okay Yoh."  
  
Yoh took a sharp cornered rock and scrape the surface of the tree, saying:  
  
"Yoh and Ren Friends Forever"  
  
Yoh looked satisfied at the tree, and then Ren added something to the words. Ren scraped a picture of food and themselves on the tree. Little Ren and Yoh laughed at the pictures of themselves eating coconut cream cake and a lot of food in front of them.  
  
"We can be friends forever, right Yoh?"  
  
"Yep!! I'll be your friend no matter what happens!"  
  
~~End of Flashback~~  
  
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~*~  
  
After Yoh remembered that memory, he remembered what was engraved to the tree. He searched and searched in the outings, but didn't prevail yet. He searched around the trees, but still no luck. When he returned to the front of the outings, he suddenly saw something written on the tree.  
  
'Yoh and Ren Friends Forever' Yoh thought to himself, and then he knew at that moment, Ren has to be in the tree!  
  
Yoh quietly climbed up the tree, and he suddenly remembered how high the tree was.  
  
'I knew Ren is good at climbing trees, but I didn't know he was this good and can climb all the way at the top. I guess ever since a year ago, I didn't know how well Ren's skills are anymore than I did when I first met him.'  
  
Yoh continued climbing the tree, and reached near the highest branch of the tree, and he saw his friend that he hasn't been hanging out with anymore.  
  
"Ren?"  
  
Ren turned to turn at the direction where Yoh is, and he wasn't surprised at all. He just turned the way he was looking at..the sky.... Yoh understood that Ren really has changed.  
  
"Why are you by yourself Ren? Don't you have any friends?"  
  
Ren continued staring at the sky, while answering Yoh's question.  
  
"I used to have a friend that I loved to hang out with, but he loves hanging out with his other friends, and ignoring me. I thought that we could be friends forever no matter what, and he broke his damn promise! I thought it was great to have friends, but I know it isn't good, cause it was breaking me."  
  
"Ren.."  
  
"So I changed..to someone I knew I was in the past before I met him..and now..the old Ren in the past is awaken and the one who met him has been vanished..for good!"  
  
"Ren..don't talk like----"  
  
"Don't call me Ren anymore, Asakura!! No friends should be able to become part of me!! I don't need friends, so back off Asakura!!"  
  
"Everyone needs at least a friend.."  
  
"Well not me!! I don't give a shit about the friend crap I've been hearing!! Get out of the tree, or I will have to make you fall off!!"  
  
"Ren..you're not the Ren I knew when I was nine!!"  
  
"Stop calling me Ren!! HE'S GONE AND HE WILL NEVER COME BACK AGAIN!! SO STOP BEING FRIENDS WITH HIM AND BE FRIENDS WITH ALL THE OTHER GODDAMN FUCKIN PEOPLE!! NOW GET OFF THE FUCKIN' TREE OR I'LL KICK YOU OUT OF THE FUCKED-UP TREE!!" (Sorry for the kind of intense swearing -_-..I mean, come on! Ren's turning evil like before he met Yoh like in the anime series.)  
  
Yoh tried to reach closer to Ren, but then..'Ren' (evil Ren) kicked Yoh in the stomach, and Yoh fell off the tree. Yoh hurt his back, but it wasn't in too much pain.  
  
'I know the Ren I used to know is still in there! He wouldn't have just given up like that! Damn, my back hurts, but luckily it wasn't as bad as I remembered it when I first met Ren and when he was a first-year student..'  
  
~*~Flashback to Ren and Yoh at nine~*~  
  
Nine-year-old Yoh is walking down to the end of the block, and then a group of fifteen years old gang surrounded Yoh, trying to steal his belongings and money.  
  
"YOU!!!! GIVE ME ALL OF YOUR BELONGINGS AND YOUR MONEY!! NOW!!"  
  
"No way!! My mother will get mad if I lose my stuff and lose my money also!!"  
  
"YOU BETTER GIVE IT TO ME!!"  
  
"NO!!"  
  
"ONE LAST CHANCE!! GIVE IT TO ME NOW!!"  
  
"I SAID NO!!!"  
  
"Then! Boys, KILL HIM AND GET HIS STUFF!!"  
  
The boys were about to attack, until another nine-year-old boy with a lance in his hand knocked all of the gang members except the leader unconscious.  
  
The leader was shock at this, and ran away from the boy and Yoh.  
  
"Thank you..you're Ren Tao from my class right?"  
  
"yeah.."  
  
Ren was about to leave, until Yoh grabbed hold of his arm.  
  
"How can I pay you back Ren?"  
  
"Nothing can be paid back, like my past. There's nothing for you to pay back."  
  
"Don't you have any friends?"  
  
"No, I don't need a friend."  
  
"Of course you do!! You're be lonely all the time if you don't!!"  
  
"Okay then, you can be my friend if it makes you happy."  
  
"Great!! How do you know all of those movements and to fight?"  
  
"It's in the past. I don't like my father who trained me ever since I was like two years old. I hate him, so I don't want to talk about him for a while."  
  
"Okay Ren! Can you teach me someday how to fight like that? I want to learn how, so I can defend myself like you defended me!"  
  
"Maybe someday in the future. You better go home, it's getting late."  
  
"Oh yeah! Ja ne, I'll see you in school tomorrow!!"  
  
"okay."  
  
~*~ End of Flashback~*~  
  
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Yoh remembered after that event, he started to talk to Ren a lot, and then they were all so happy together as friends. But now..Yoh kind of thought of Ren as something else, like a boyfriend, though it would surprise Ren, since he never told Ren that he was gay.  
  
Yoh got up from the fall Ren made him do, and then the lunch bell rang, signaling everyone to get to class in about five minutes. Yoh slowly got up, trying not to pull a muscle when walking to class.  
  
~*~  
  
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After school, Yoh have to try to talk to Ren. Yoh looked around the campus, and saw Ren, walking by himself on the block. Yoh ran up to Ren, standing in front of Ren. Ren looked up and see Yoh, and then glared at Yoh.  
  
"Asakura, get the fuck away from the road!!"  
  
"I remember the Ren I thought I have some feelings for wouldn't swear at people unless they were his enemies."  
  
"He's gone and never coming back! He thought friends were okay, but now, friends are enemies to him also. No one loves him and he decided to go away forever!"  
  
"He can't go away forever!! He's my best friend and nothing can change that!!"  
  
"What about the time last year when you didn't even hang out with him? You didn't even considered his feelings to eat with him in the tree that he longed to have someone eat with him! He changed, and you can never change him back!!"  
  
"Ren..I didn't know that you were THAT lonely.."  
  
"Too late now, he's gone and never coming back to the world, and STOP CALLING ME REN!!"  
  
"I will help you turn back to my old childhood friend..why am I that blind to not see someone who defended me from gangs turn into one of the gang too?!?"  
  
"You were too blind to noticed..NOW GET OUT OF THE WAY!!"  
  
Ren pushed Yoh on the ground and walked pass him. Yoh turned to feel major pain in his heart, and looked at the road Ren took with tears about to burst.  
  
"I have to change him back, for the sake of himself being evil and for me to stop being so blind at situations like this..I guess I'll have to make a surprise visit to him, but I have to call Jun first."  
  
Yoh walked back home, feeling guilty for making Ren turned into someone from the past that Ren talked to him about few years back. Yoh was lucky that the next day was Saturday, so he can spend more time talking to Ren at the hotel.  
  
~*~  
  
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The next day at Ren's place, Jun told Ren that she would be looking around Tokyo for some food to buy, since they were running out of food easily, since they haven't been shopping for food in a few weeks.  
  
Jun left the door, leaving it slightly opened, so Ren shouldn't notice it anyway, and she can let Yoh come in. Jun waited for a few minutes, and then Yoh appeared, running to Jun. He gave her a thumb up, and Jun left the room, happy that Ren might be returning to his old happy self.  
  
Yoh opened the door, and saw Ren, sitting on the couch, polishing the lance he has in his arms.  
  
Yoh walked more inside, and then he knew at that moment, Ren would know that he was here.  
  
"There's no way that I can't sense you Asakura. You better leave, or else, I'll have to destroy humans on this earth like my father wanted me to when I came to Tokyo."  
  
"I made a promise to myself that we will be friends forever, and I'm not going to lose one of my best friends because of my mistake!"  
  
"There's no way that you could make me believe that you could be my friend again, cause it's already too late!!"  
  
"It's never too late to say that you can't have friends!! You have a friend that will want you to be happy, no matter what!"  
  
"You intend to make that happen, but you know that I wasn't happy last year! I have no friend to eat lunch with, no one who wants to be my lab partner because I have a symbol on my back that scares a lot of people, and my glare scares the hell out of everyone! DO YOU THINK I WAS HAPPY!"  
  
"I didn't think you would be this lonely and unhappy. I intend to change that whole situation. I found out something that make me think that it will change you back.."  
  
"And what the hell would that be?"  
  
"I found out just yesterday, I was having a heart-ache, since I was really missing someone yesterday..he was the reason I'm still alive today..and I figure out this feeling whenever I'm around you..I love you, Ren Tao!"  
  
"You can't love me! No one loves me, not even my father!"  
  
"You're wrong, your sister loves you too, but as a sister. I love you as a lover, nothing else!"  
  
"How can I know if you love me if you avoid me for a whole year!"  
  
"I didn't avoid you!! When I made friends last year, I was helping them learn the campus around school, helping them find friends, and I would be their friend too. I wanted to go to you last year, but everyone talks to me and make me avoid you! Only my real group of friends helped me by letting me find you!"  
  
"You can't prove that you love me Asakura!!"  
  
"Maybe I can't, but I know another way that I could prove my love to you."  
  
"What the---"  
  
Before Ren could speak further, Yoh moved and leaned over to Ren and sealed his lips over Ren, feeling the same way he dreamt of last night, since last night was the time he learned that he actually loved Ren more than a friend. Ren dropped his lance when Yoh began to descend on him.  
  
Yoh parted his lips, and then Ren was fighting inside of himself. Yoh held Ren in his arms, letting Ren try to fight the evilness away, and renewing his soul to become the Ren everyone loves.  
  
Yoh stroked Ren's cheek, while Ren was holding on to his head and fighting his inner self. After Ren stopped struggling, Yoh thought that Ren has returned to normal..but..  
  
Ren started punching Yoh really hard in the ribs, making Yoh winced at the pain, but not letting go of Ren. Both of them fell on the couch, and Yoh was over Ren.  
  
"LET THE FUCK GO!"  
  
"NO REN!! You may be abnormal right now, but I'm never letting you go again! I've learned from you the past few days that I wasn't being with you like I promised when we engraved the tree."  
  
"LET GO!!"  
  
"No..I love you too much to let you go.."  
  
"You don't love me!!"  
  
"Yes I do!"  
  
"Prove it!! I know you-----"  
  
Yoh descended his lips on Ren's again, almost like signaling him to shut up and let love conquer. Yoh kissed deeper, and then the whole world disappeared, both of them were closing their eyes, and their own fantasies appear in their mind. Yoh and Ren thinking of the same thing, and feeling the same sensation.  
  
When Yoh was losing oxygen, he parted his lips and broke the kiss slowly. Yoh looked at Ren, and saw him in a state of shock right now. Ren's spirit rose inside of him, and then his evilness broke apart, leaving the Ren that was friendly to Yoh and kind of nice.  
  
"Hey..Yoh."  
  
"Ren...is it really you, the one I met when I was nine?"  
  
"Who else would it be?"  
  
"Thank god you're normal!!"  
  
"It's great to be back too. And now, since you already confessed your love for me..I love you too Yoh, and I know you would somehow keep your promises."  
  
Yoh was happy to see Ren again, and not seeing him evil like the past few days. Ren reached out his hand and move it towards Yoh's face. Ren stroked Yoh's face and then let his hand move in Yoh's hair.  
  
Yoh smiled at Ren, and leaned towards Ren, since there was some space between them. Ren pulled Yoh's face really close so that Ren could kiss him. They tipped over, so both of them were on their sides.  
  
Yoh took the time and then he took off Ren's usual clothes, but taking off the shirt and jacket. After Yoh finished taking off Ren's tops, he reached out to Ren's chest and then let his hand run over the surface.  
  
Ren took off Yoh's black and orange shirt and both of them laid the clothes on the side of the couch. Ren looked at Yoh's chest, and saw some bruises and small cuts that were probably from him since he was punching Yoh pretty hard earlier.  
  
Yoh was about to reach inside of Ren's trousers, but Ren stopped him.  
  
"Let's not get carried away Yoh. I'll let you do that when we're adults."  
  
"But that's TOO long.."  
  
"Fine, your sweet sixteenth birthday, okay?"  
  
"Okay. At least it's better than waiting five years!"  
  
"Gladly agreed. I need you to help me bandage your chest, it looks beaten up badly by me."  
  
"Unluckily Ren, I can't move a lot from my waistline. I'll just wait here."  
  
"Okay, I'll get your bandages."  
  
Ren walked out of the living and into the bathroom to get the first aid kit that was provided by the hotel people.  
  
Ren walked back to Yoh in the living room, and saw him listening to music like usual.  
  
He sat next to Yoh, who has his eyes closed, and got out some things to help Yoh heal himself. Ren took out some cotton balls and alcohol, and then he pour a small amount until the cotton ball was fairly wet.  
  
Without Yoh looking, Ren spread some of the alcohol on the bruises, and then, Yoh felt some small pain inflicted from his chest.  
  
"Yoh, just calm down, and let me finish cleaning the bruises and small cuts. I'll try to finish quickly."  
  
Ren continued cleaning up Yoh's chest, and then he bandaged Yoh's chest.  
  
After Ren was done, he announced to Yoh that he was done. Yoh looked at his chest, and saw it was very neatly wrapped.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"Daijoubu desu ka (Are you okay)?"  
  
"Daijoubu (I'm okay)."  
  
"That's good to hear, you know when Jun is coming back?"  
  
Yoh kissed Ren's nose, and then he answered, "She'll be coming back after she's done buying some groceries, since you guys haven't been stocking up on food."  
  
"Oh.."  
  
~*~  
  
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On Monday during lunch, Yoh and Ren got out of class together and both of them have their lunch in their hands. Yoh saw everyone that was hanging out with him ever since Ren's been avoiding him. Yoh looked at Ren, and saw him smiling at Yoh, and then he walked to the tree that was special to the both of them.  
  
Lyserg was the first who asked Yoh, "How did it turned out with you and Ren?"  
  
"It was great."  
  
Everyone started to talk questions, and Ren saw all of the commotion. He decided to help Yoh this one time to get out of the crowd. Ren jumped down from the tree and then he walked over to the crowd that was surrounding Yoh.  
  
Ren got through everyone amazedly and then next to Yoh when he reached there. And then..  
  
.................  
  
.................  
  
.................  
  
Ren shouted out to everyone: "IF YOU DON'T WANT TO MESS AROUND WITH ME, STOP ASKING YOH QUESTIONS AND MOVE ON WITH YOUR LUNCH!!"  
  
.................  
  
.................  
  
.................  
  
Everyone scattered to the tables and everyone began eating, talking about something else that doesn't concern Yoh or Ren.  
  
Yoh was speechless when everyone left because of Ren, and he was relieved not to answer a lot of personal questions and relationship between him and Ren.  
  
"Thanks Ren."  
  
Ren smirked at Yoh, and then he tried to walk back to the tree, but Yoh put his hand on Ren's shoulders.  
  
"I'll come and eat with you. I need to repay the times I didn't go to the tree with you. And, you always seem so lonely."  
  
"You don't have to. If you're happy with them, go eat with them."  
  
"I think I can have both. Just come with me and see why."  
  
Yoh walked over to his friends that kept him company since last year. Yoh waved his hands at them and said, "Yo!"  
  
Everyone gave him a nod and continued eating.  
  
"How about you guys come eat at the outings? It's a beautiful day, and it's a shame if you can't see the skies."  
  
Everyone got up and followed Yoh and Ren to the outings. Yoh and Ren reached to the tree, and started climbing.  
  
"You guys can eat at the bottom! Ren and I need some time to catch up with each other. You guys have fun too."  
  
Everyone scattered near the tree, while Yoh and Ren reached to the top of the tree branch. Ren sat quietly and began to eat, while Yoh reached to sit next to him. Luckily, the tree was strong enough to hold both of them.  
  
"Ren."  
  
"Yoh, we both know our feelings. We have to wait before we go to the extremes."  
  
"I know..so, have you done anything to the tree ever since I wasn't here?"  
  
"If I remembered correctly, I think yesterday I carved something right here, when I was free from Jun and I needed to visit some places."  
  
Yoh looked the craving, and saw something that wasn't really surprising, but still surprising. It was a love shaped heart with Yoh + Ren forever. Yoh turned around, and gave him a sweet smile.  
  
'Ren's Loneliness is gone, and he's the angel of my heart...I hope we can be forever friends and lovers..'  
  
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~*~Owari (End)~*~  
  
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That was a really long one-shot!! The whole story is about 13 pages ^^!! Not too much, I know, but it's still a lot ^^!! Please review!!  
  
Please review!! And maybe read The Lost Angel I Found from my list of stories if you like this pairing too ^^!!!  
  
Tell me if I might have to do a yaoi lemon, cause I think we might need a sequel for it, you know that promise Ren made to Yoh that they will go further on Yoh's 16th birthday. Tell me if I should, though it will going to be my first ever yaoi lemon. ^^!!  
  
Please review!!  
  
~~Silver-Kitsune Kazeko~~ 


End file.
